Do you know me?

I miss being known.

I knew this was coming… I mentioned it before we moved. 
And here it is…it’s unavoidable. I miss being known

I miss walking into a room and glancing across to a familiar face and knowing that they know me. Where I am not worried about what people think if my kids act out, if they are eating McDonalds, or if they are watching Go Diego. Because I know the know me. They knew me before I had children, they knew my heart, they listened to what I had to say. 
They trusted me… They respected me…   They knew me.

I was somebody...I don’t mean that pridefully either. But after 8 years of living and loving and investing deeply in a church and community, I felt like somebody… Somebody who was known.

I could laugh with them, and joke with them, and be a little sarcastic with them... and they knew. 
       They knew I was just being me. 

They knew I could be ridiculously silly 1 minute, and crying over my sin the next.  They knew I was a good mom even if my 10month old was not sleeping through the night, or if my 2 year old threw yet another tantrum in the hallway.

They knew my story, and they were a part of it. And I just miss that.   I miss being known by those people.  I miss the ease of our relationships...being able to call someone on a whim for a last minute playdate. Or to not have to apologize about a messy house, laundry on the couch, or dishes in the sink.

I miss the glances in the hallway that meant more to me than any 30 minute conversations--- those glances that say --
“I know you, I love you, I am praying for you,
            and I am right here with you friend”

There is something very comforting about being known.
It is safe. Even in seasons where depth is lacking or when time is limited... you can rest easy in the comfort of being known.
Because you are not alone.  These people are your people...

They may not all be your best friends, but these people know you.  They have wept with you and rejoiced with you, they have seen God provide in amazing ways, and you don’t have to explain to them your history.
           Because they know.

And I miss that.
Because now...I am a nobody (not really, but I’m just making a point here).  It’s not that I am a nobody really… just that I am not known yet.   And I have no personal resume I can hand to them to let them know that I am a great person with a lot to offer and a huge heart ready to be their best friend.

I am meeting and greeting and smiling and trying to remember names. Wondering... “What do they think of me? Will my children embarrass me? Will I fit in? ” How long will it be before I can rest in the comfort of being known here?

So today, I rest in the One who knew me in my mother’s womb. Who knows the numbers of hairs on my head.   Who knew me before the creation of the world.  Who loves me (and my wild children)  

He is a God Who knows.

**disclaimer— Everyone here has been more than friendly and welcoming.  Just this afternoon I wrote down well over 50 names of women I have met (and those are the ones whose names I can remember).  I love it here… it’s just that it will take some time before I am known here. 

To Be Known…

Last night was a great night celebrating with friends. 
A last hoo-ra Mom’s Night Out.  And it was fab-u-lous! 

We wined and dined and laughed till they kicked us out.

We joked about my rowdy little llamas, our upcoming move,
I drew on the (paper) table cloth a not-to-scale map of the mall and Capitol Hill, we wondered if we could get a “sponsor” for our dinner.  I tried to convince them to all start blogging…
That the world would be a better place if they all were blogging. 

One friend is the most loyal and initiative friend ever.
One friend is moving soon to Pennsylvania…to be a professor!
One friend is Potty Training today...Good Luck Tracey!
(the only blogger of the group)
One friend is a lawyer, but should have been a comedian.
One friend looks like a model… even after 3 boys.
One friend has the cutest little girls ever…it should be a sin.
One friend is the most encouraging, prayerful mom ever.

And there were a lot of friends who couldn’t make it…

As we talked about my upcoming move, the overwhelming feel I got from the evening and from that table of ladies was…

They get me…

And I am known.

And that feeling can calm the most anxious heart.
And it is very sad to leave a place where I know so many and where I am known.   Where people think I have something to offer… where they understand I can go from silly to serious in .2 seconds.  Where we can joke about my crazy kids and not me feel embarrassed about it.  Where they treat me like a friend.

When I move, will I be understood?
Will people want to get to know me?

 

Ladies, thanks for a great evening! 
I will miss you all SO much!

But as one friend pointed out…
we can still stay so connected through the Blog and Facebook.
Now, if only we can convince all of them to start blogging…
Are there any sponsors out there??

 

And now, in all my spare time,
I am off to read Hemingway….wink, wink

Keep it or Toss it?

That is the question we are asking almost every day…
If you guessed earlier that I was cleaning out a Junk Drawer—
you were right on the money! 

I dumped the whole drawer out and tried to lay it out in some organized fashion… let’s just say, there was no organizing this mess.

Charlotte came in and said “you are going to be in so much trouble when Daddy sees this mess”

 
Then she joined the fun…

You know…
since everyone needs 5 screwdrivers in their junk drawer

Or approximately 50 pens and markers…
Yet somehow we never can find a pen.
And though we never use highlighters…
there are about 12 of them. 


Fish bowl treatment for the fish we had and now is no longer.
And matches…which aren’t supposed to be in a drawer that is within reach of my 3 and 4 year old.

 

Some paint can openers.
Because you never do know when in the middle of making chicken parm you might need to pop open a can of paint.
Or 3 cans, for that matter.

Electrical tape…for all those MacGyver moves…in the kitchen.
And Dental floss…that should not be used by anyone. Ever.

 

A 3 prong adapter.  from when we moved in almost 4 years ago.
There were no 3 prongs in the house. 
(hence the electrical tape?)

A paci--- for an almost 15m old who hasn’t taken a paci a single day in her life.  (Though she would play with them like rattles)
And we all want our babies playing with pacis that have been sitting with junk---fishbowl chemicals, matches, pens, etc.  
Nice.

Left over was a drawer full of candles from birthdays and stickers from potty training.  And trash. 

 

I did come across this pen. 
A shout out to the friend who inspired me to write this post.
Little did she know that this pen from her wedding was sitting in my junk drawer…it is one of my favorite pens…and is not junk.

So those were a few of my favorite things found in the drawer above.  We also had glue, craft paint, hand sanitizer, batteries, chargers, instructions, menus, chip clips, hair clips, staples for my staple gun, tape, extra straws for sippy cups.

But no $100 dollar bills.   What’s up with that??

How does this happen?

So..What about YOU??
What’s in YOUR junk drawer?
Go take a look and comment with your funniest or most embarrassing thing in your junk drawer.

 

Goodbyes

I am not good with the goodbyes and this kind of feels like the never ending send-off.  I am sure my friends are thinking “has this lady moved yet?? just go ahead and move already” 

But it is so hard to say goodbye to our life here.  We have made a history here.   We can look back on the great faithfulness God has shown us in our years here.    And though sad….we can look back on His great kindness and be comforted to know…. He will do it again.

We had a special time celebrating last night with some great friends.   We were surprised with dessert with a group of local alumni who all were involved with our ministry while in college.  They are all members with us at our local church now.  
         
                 Worshipping….ministering…living out the Gospel.   

Some of them as students who were not walking with God 8 years ago….that is The Gospel in Action.  The Power of God to save! 
It was so neat to remember the early days of meeting these 18 year olds their freshman year…

And now they have Graduated….
                 Gotten married…

And some of them have children in the nursery with our own…  

(the above picture is 3 1/2 years old, but it is SO precious!)

We stand amazed at all God has done in the lives of students over the the past 10 years.  And we ask that He do it again in DC! 

We’ll probably be going to a lot of Goodbye dinners, Fairwell mom’s nights, and Send off play groups this next month.  But this was by far one of the most memorable.  To be reinded of all that God has done in the lives of students… who are now our peers and close friends.   Priceless.

When people wonder 
             Why are you selling your home and moving to DC.  
             Is it really worth it?  

We will remember that room last night…and SO many others who weren’t in that room.  And know…with no doubt in our minds…

That this Goodbye is Totally Worth it.
Do it again Lord!

These are a few of…

My Favorite Things!  Sing it with me now…

Favorite things about Greensboro, that is.
             This one goes out to all the locals.   
                          Make the most of this great city you are in!

 

I love our precious Downtown.  When we first married, “struggling” was an understatement for Elm Street.   I remember eating at one of the only restaurants down there called The Paisley Pineapple.

Elm Street was mainly run down buildings, a couple trashy night clubs, old antique shops, and a few random sketchy (not nice) art galleries.  And one crazy coffee shop that is still going strong today.

We have loved seeing Elm Street grow…and would stalk vacant buildings, praying a fabulous shop or restaurant would occupy the space. 

 

And slowly but surely Elm street has been transformed. 

You’ve got restaurants, salons, designer shops,  art galleries, antique stores, a center city park, valet parking (which was of course my husband’s brilliant business idea that someone else capitalized on first…ahem) And even fabulous a minor league ball park!

I love Cheescakes by Alex.  We first began frequenting Alex’s in 2003 when when it was just a walk up counter and Alex was the only guy there.  Now…it is a full service coffee bar and dessertery with live Jazz on the weekends.   We are known to be there almost every date night we get.  And often drop by to get a slice to go… even when having babies at the hospital. 

I love the The Bog Garden.   This is one of my favorite places to take the kids to run their wiggles out.  We see the ducks, enjoy God’s beautiful creation and they can have the freedom to run the boardwalk.   Greensboro has fabulous parks and playgrounds, and the awesome Greenway that we used to live behind.  We have thoroughly enjoyed the parks and rec here in Greensboro!

 
Love, Love, LOVE  The Green Valley Grill.   If there is one place we would want to eat when we come back to visit, it would be the GVG.  Many anniversaries, Valentine’s Days, and birthdays were celebrated here, and we have never been disappointed.  A fabulous atmosphere matched with a stellar chef produces a culinary delight!

I love Target… and the fact that I have 3 of them within 15 minutes of me.  1 within 3 minutes of my home.    And yes… Maybe I have driven around town to frequent ALL 3 of them in one day looking for the size 4 dress or a 6th cup to match a set, or scavenging the sale racks.  Yes, that would be. 

I love the  Natural Science Center.  We have had a membership there for a few years which allows us to go for just 1 hour or even just 30 minutes.  And we go often…probably once a week.  We love the animals, and the play room, and the dinosaur exhibit.  And especially the show “Indiana Bones”. Many fun memories at the Science Center.

I love our church.
We have been there our whole time in Greensboro.  They have seen us in our newlywed, new parents, and preschool parenting stages.  They have become a part of our history, and we theirs.  We have seen families come and go… for good reasons and bad. 
Like most churches… we have experienced the Valley together.  And the mountain as well.   We LOVE our church.   We are known there…and they still love us.

 

These are just a few of my favorite things… 
And I know you must be thinking….
                 But you are moving to Washington, DC???

Yes,  Yes I am… And I am sure I will find a favorite local eatery, and some great dessert places.  And parks and museums?  I think there might just be a few (hundred) of those.   And there is a Target about 15 min (in good traffic) from us.  And a church…we are going to a fabulous church.

 

Yes… I will find a whole new list of favorite things.
     But for now, I am going to live it up in Greensboro these last weeks.  And I have a date tonight…. So, I’ll be seeing you at Cheesecakes by Alex later!

 

What are your favorite things to do in your city?
If you were moving, what would you miss?
Do you take advantage of the great local finds in your city?

Feels Like Home to Me…

Home…
     where you hang your hat. 
            where your heart is.
                  where everybody knows your name.

My husband visited his childhood home of Tampa recently, and though he hasn’t lived there since 1993, he said “It still just feels like home in a way”

And I totally understood what he meant.

There are a few sacred places that I treasure deep in my heart and will always feel like Home to me.  I can ride over a Lowcountry bridge and feelings from 1996 can come rushing back.  The smells, the sounds, a song, a certain food.  And I am brought to that place…full of so many memories.

~~~
It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me…

It feels like I'm all the way back where I come from…

(no, not my house..HA!)
It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me…

It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong
(And yes… I know that song is being sung about a person…
but it just captures what I feel)

~~~~

And this sacred place has certainly made the list. 
There are memories made here that will be etched on my heart for eternity.  It will forever feel like home to me.

I can’t help but tear up wondering if my children will even remember this place that is so dear…. will this make their list of places that “feel like Home” to them?

Sadly, I know the answer is… probably not. 
They will have very few memories of our life here. 

But it feels like Home to me. 

~~~~

Yet I am confident that this place will quickly feel like home as well.

I find even greater hope knowing that
though these places surely feel like home to me….
That truly…. I am not home yet.

“I have gone to prepare a place for you” John 14:2

Thanks for peeking into my heart for a minute…
What are the places that feel like home for you?

I am not in Denial

It’s really happening… 

I haven’t talked much on my blog about our upcoming move to Washington, DC… because it has been an “upcoming move” now for about a year….it has been a dream or an idea for over 3 years.

            Or maybe I have been in Denial.

But we are moving to Washington, DC

3 1/2 years ago made an offer on this house… I was 4 months pregnant with Carson….and we were in  DC on one of our first investigation trips. (ironic..or providential?)

The house needed a LOT of love and upgrading, and we had the heart and the hands (we work with college students…no brainer) to do it.    (I hope to share some fun pics with you in the coming weeks)

Back in the fall of 2006, we would talk about the year 2010-2011
as a possible DC ministry launch date and it seemed so far off. 

It was just a dream, a vision…a what if

Then the “what if” turned it to a possible… 
       then a probable…
             then a plan….
                    And then we put our house on the market.

Well…it is 2010 folks.  And it got here in the blink of an eye.

And we are moving to Washington, DC

We have been praying for months that God would bring the right buyer at the right time.    And last week He did.   Our launch date has been Early June, but we were beginning to think it may be bumped to late June.  And then all it took was one buyer…who saw on house on Monday, made an offer on Wednesday and we signed a contract on Thursday. 

Yes, we are moving to Washington, DC

In approximately 5 weeks 3 days…Give or take a few.

This will be my home soon (okay...so maybe not THIS home)

I have a lot to do in the next 5 weeks. 
I am a roller coaster of emotions…Dave is loving that!

excited

scared

eager

hesitant

dreaming of what’s to coming

remembering all that’s been

trusting

fearing

good anxious

not so good anxious

sad to leave

ready to go

I am looking forward to sharing our journey with you… 

-Of how I managed to show our house over 30 times in the past 3 months, with 3 children. 

 

-Of what I am going to miss about Greensboro

 

-Of my process of leaving and going. 
                      (do you pick up on the difference)

 

-Of what we have done to this house to make it our home

-Of my thoughts on earthly belongings and how this world is not our home…thoughts of storing up your treasures in heaven

-Of thoughts on schooling decisions

 

I have lots to share… but it may not be your light hearted Little Llamas all the time.   Though I promise to throw in a little bit of Llama Laughs to lighten it up.   And I have a great Giveaway coming up soon!

And I also reserve the right to check out at a certain point when things becoming too much to handle.

So the count down is on…
And I promise I am NOT in denial. 

We are moving to Washington, DC.
These Little Llamas are about to embark on Life on the Hill.