Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen. He named it Ebenezer, saying, "Thus far has the LORD helped us."
Throughout my life there are many Ebenezers...Rocks of Remembrance, per se.
Some are great glorious moments that change my life in amazing ways....the day I decided to truly follow God, the day of my wedding, the birth of my children, seeing breathtaking views of African plains. If these rocks were stacked in my garden the mound would be high and mighty and great symbol of God's faithfulness.
Yet there are other Ebenezers that we raise... other Rocks that we add to the pile that represent the most challenging times in our lives, the heartaches, the tears, the darkest hours....yet in those moments too God has come through in amazing ways and always whispers...
"I am still faithful, and will remain faithful"
"I have not left you, nor forsaken you"
"I have a plan for you, for your good"
"I am God and there is no other."
You know the ones... those moments that make you doubt it all...when faith and "life" collide. How do bad things happen to good people? Is God really sovereign over sick babies, cancer, car accidents?? And my theology....well more importantly God's Word...tells me a resounding YES.
My ways are not His ways and I may not always understand His Master Plan... but I believe with every ounce of my body that God is in control, and that He uses what we view as horrible situations to bring about good. Good in and for us, Good to others. His purpose will prevail.
So, Here I raise My Ebenezer!
Last Saturday the children and I were in a horrible car accident. We are all okay...minus a lot of bruises on me and little fracture in my sternum. The van was totalled. It was my fault. The other driver is pretty badly injured...though he will recover fully.
I am humiliated, embarrassed, mad at myself...asking how did this happen, why did this happen?
Yet already in so many ways, I have seen the fingerprints of God all over this. Protecting us, comforting us, using the body of Christ to care for us. I have been humbled, and reminded how temporary this life really is. I have a renewed love for my children (who still wake at 6 and fight like animals)...but i have been reminded how sweet and precious their little lives are, and I cannot even fathom what I would do if anything ever happened to them.
I still believe God is in control and has a purpose for all of this. I will say like Samuel "thus far the Lord has helped us". I will look back on all the past Grace and Mercy He has shown me and confidently know that He will continue that faithfulness now, and ever more. He has not forsaken me.
This is one of those Ebenezers that will stick with me forever. In a blink of an eye my perspective on so many things has changed. I will look back on that day and know that I am a different person.... but I have a God that has remained the same, and will remain the same forever.
Slow to Anger
Thank you to all of you who have prayed for us, cared for us, and just been there. Please continue to pray for the other driver to fully recover and that he might know God in a very real and close way right now.
The night of the accident television shows, blogs, internet surfing all seemed a little trite and meaningless. I took a nice hot shower and curled up on the bed and read my Bible. My heart landed on a verse...
"But as for me, I will always have hope;
I will praise you more and more"
And I can't sum it up any more than that. I hate that all this happened. It has been a hard week. But I know the One in whom I have placed my hope. He will not disappoint.
And instead of doubting Him, I choose to use this opportunity to praise Him more and more.
Add another Rock to the pile.....
Here I raise my Ebenezer!
Here I raise my Ebenezer!