Good not Gone

I sat across from her and asked her “so when does it get easier?”  The weariness, the physical demands--- the always being needed, being the only one who can meet the needs.  And she just sweetly smiled while she shook her head and said
     “you are asking the wrong question. You cannot look for this to be over--- you have to give your all to this season right now” 

You see… when it comes to fight vs. flight, I am a fighter. 
I don’t want to just barely survive.  I want to thrive.  I am a pull yourself up by your bootstraps and do it kind of gal.  I want to do it, and I want to do it well.  And I just kind of wanted to know… How much longer is this going to be this hard??   This job of mothering little people. I wanted to know, when do we move out of the “little people” stage?  Is it when they are all over 5? 6?  

You see, they made a huge move just like us about 9 years ago.  The summer they moved they had 5 children and her youngest was a baby.  He is now 8.   Crazy.    How did that happened SO fast???   It made me realize that before I even know it, all of my children (including this new baby) will be 8 and up.  In 8 years, I will have an 8, 11,13, and 14 year old.   They will no longer be “little people” 

These years are going to go by so fast.   And yet, these are weary years.  I know the reality that now it is a physical weariness but as they get older it will be more emotional weariness as we tread the waters of life with teenagers, emotions and hormones (oh my!) possible rebellion, and, Lord Willing, true conversions in the hearts of our children.   Weariness just comes with the territory…

So, It’s not that I just want these “little people” years to be gone…
It’s that I want them to be good years.   Get that?  It’s not that I want these years to be gone, it’s that I want them to be good.

I don’t’ want to look back in 8 years and think: 
    It’s over… it flew by and I missed it… I wished it away. 

I want to make the most of every story time, every cuddle, every boo boo. I want to welcome the role of chauffeur, chef, referee, paramedic, teacher and more.   I welcome these weary years with little people.  Because in 8 years, I will have no babies, no toddlers, no preschoolers.  This is my chance to be the mother God has called me to be to these children… right now.

And I am committed to doing what I can, by God’s Grace,
to make these years, these days, these moments… Good.   

I don’t want to spend my days wanting them gone…
I want them Good. 
Because before I know it, they will be gone.

Welcome Back Friends!

Happy January 20th.

Confession— I just uploaded my Christmas pictures to my computer like 5 minutes ago. And I haven’t taken any pictures since Christmas, unless on my phone.   So relive Christmas with us here for a moment. 

Carry on.

So, It’s been a while.  And I have no particular reason.  And I am just fine with that.   It’s not like I just had a baby  (Ironically, I will probably post more after the baby comes to keep all the family appeased with pictures and such).  My computer did not die (though that does remind me, I probably need to do a major system back up before it does).  I am not depressed, and I don’t have writer’s block.   I actually have a lot I could write about.

Truth be told, I have just been being a mama and running a household.  I have been trying to be “busy at home” instead of just plain busy.   That in no way means our household has been in stellar condition, our meals gourmet, or our children supernaturally transformed because of all the love and attention I have given them.   It simply means I have been trying to give myself to the greater cause.   And in doing so, I am finding great satisfaction in my days… great peace in knowing I have tried my hardest to honor God with this great calling of Motherhood.

 

In the past month I have…
-Been at a National Conference with 5,000 college students, phenomenal speakers, great friends, and no children of my own.
-Had a few amazing conversations with friends and mentors that were like water in the desert. 
-Read some phenomenal articles, blog posts, and books that have really helped me to evaluate my mothering, homemaking, etc
-Taken down all our Christmas decorations
-Hosted a baby shower.
-Moved 3 children into one room, including a toddler into a bed.

(I said 3 children in 1 room… I never said anything about them having their own beds.)

-Began collecting the necessary baby equipment for Baby 4
-Hosted 10 guys to watch some important football game that I knew nothing about.   But I fed them well.
-Realized my children know what Tebowing is.


-Took advantage of some of the unseasonably warm January days we’ve had (but as I speak it is in the low 30’s)
-Gained about 5 lbs… or maybe more.
(It was the holidays… and I am growing a human being you know)
-Been growing my hair out—it helps with the baby weight I am gaining… and enjoying my winter head wrap


-Washed our pillows and quilts and realized I don’t do this nearly enough. (we might get some new pillows and start from scratch)
-Joined a new meal planning website, which I am loving.
-Continued a meal swap with a friend and neighbor. 
    (I bring her a meal one week, she brings us one the next week)
-Homeschooled my kindergartner.
-Enjoyed a much needed mom’s night out

 

So… that’s just a little of what’s been going on. 
I haven’t given up on Little Llamas.    Rather, the opposite.  I have been giving myself TO my Little Llamas.  I have said NO to the good, in order to say YES to the best.  I have spent much needed time making choices, evaluating my time, my schedule, my commitments.   I didn’t intend to take a Blog sabbatical, but it certainly turned into that. 

I do still have much to say. Those who know me well, know that to always be the case.  Much is swirling around this mama’s heart, and I am eager to share.   Thanks for being gracious and patient with my absence.  Admit it--- there was a deep void in your life the past month.  Right??  

Well, Welcome back!  Welcome Back to you… and Welcome back to me.  I can’t wait to share more in the weeks and months to come!  So stick around---- life is always fun in our herd of Little Llamas!

Glory to God in the Highest!

Merry Christmas!

"Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."

From our family to yours, we wish you the very merriest of Christmases.  May you know the true peace that only comes from the Christ child!  And this is why we rejoice so much today-

“For God made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.”
                                                                                  2 Corinthians 5:21

Real Life Behind the Scenes of Christmas

In this pinterest world we live in, it is easy to think that everyone's mantle is perfectly decorated with candles lit every morning,

That maybe they do feed their kids waffles on their Christmas China, and that the cute family in the Christmas Card picture really is that adorably dressed all the time. 


A world where Advent devotions get done every night at 6:45 without ever missing, and our children are actually grateful for
this season, not selfish, and eager to be generous.

Where our Christmas trees are perfectly adorned.

And we all just sip our nice holiday drinks while listening to Christmas Classics in nicely candle-lit room…
Just enjoying the Christmas moment.


And our hearts are perfectly centered on the
True meaning of Christmas.

 

Well, my friends…It’s not true.  We don’t live in Pinterest.
                   We live in real life. 

 

Where the laundry is thrown ‘round the room without care…

In hopes that a housekeeper soon would appear.

Real life…  Real Decembers.

Yes, I still sip my peppermint mocha and listen to my Josh Groban Christmas CD,--- but not while simply gazing upon the tree… while folding laundry and making grocery lists, and cleaning up hotwheels and baby dolls.  

Real life--
Where you go to get a dozen donuts to take to the local firefighters and your child erupts in a fit of tears because he thought the donuts were for him and he doesn’t want to give the donuts away….  doesn’t it sound like a great Christmas moment about learning generosity? 

Where it’s December 9th, but only 4 of your advent devotion cards are up... We’ll catch up… we’ve got plenty of time.

You won’t find these stories on Pinterest.   And that’s ok.
And it’s why I am just stepping back from some of the blogs and pinterest right now.. with all the advent devotion ideas, and tradition ideas, all the posts and links on all the things, recipes, and activities I must do in order to “make a memory.”

Well… making memories cannot be rushed. And quite honestly, I feel rushed by this world of blogs and facebook telling me how to celebrate, what to teach my kids, and showing me elaborate pictures of all the food and crafts that there is no way I  am going to make.   I mean how are my kids ever going to have a good memory if we don’t A, B, and C?? Will they ever grasp the true meaning of the season if I don’t do X, Y and Z??

And so I resort to my motto of late.

Making Memories cannot be rushed.   I will not be rushed. 
My children will still grow up having fond memories of Christmas even if I don’t make a wreath out of lollipop sticks, or homemade gingerbread nutella cookies.   I do not have to have the picture perfect Christmas all done by today in order for Christmas to be a memory.   Christmas will not be rushed.  Memories cannot be rushed.

So I decorated my house on December 6th (gasp!).  Have not baked a holiday cookie yet.  We are slowly catching up on our advent devotion.  And we are going to have plenty of time to enjoy this grand season of celebrating the Savior’s birth.   So, internet… I will not allow you to rush me.   I will make myself another cup of Peppermint Mocha and fold my laundry, homeschool my child, buy and wrap some presents.  Find a live nativity to take our kiddos to. 

We will make plenty of memories.  Christ will be celebrated.  My children will remember these days of their childhood with smiles (dear Lord, I pray they will).  

But these memories… they will not be rushed. 
Rather than compare myself, my decorations, my baking, my Christmas card, etc to the rest of the world…
I will do what I can with the capacity God has given me. 

And then I will enjoy my family.  And I will enjoy Christmas. 
Off now to make some memories---

Meet Jon

Jon Jon that is…
I had enough of you ask what as Jon Jon was that I had to explain.  And Sadly I don’t have any pictures of some of my favorites.  The summer jon jon without a shirt on underneath. 

I just have a thing about dressing little babies like babies.  Especially boys.   Girls are easy to dress as babies.  But boys… it can be harder.  Personally, I don’t think a baby under 6 months should touch denim, or sweater vests.  That’s just me though.   (if I see your baby dressed in jeans and sweater I will probably swoon all over him just the same)

But for me…I just think this is what a baby should look like.   Swoon. 
Now, don’t get me wrong, my child will wear plenty of carters outfits and shirts and pants….but before 1 year old, I am all about soft cottons and dressing them like a baby.  And the Jon Jon.   

Some call it a shortall, or a longall (if it is long).  Sometimes they are kind of like overalls.

Or sometimes they are more like a romper one piece.   Oh my word.  I believe everyone needs a blow up picture of their children at 1… because they were SO darn cute then.

 

Yes, I admit we wore these outfits more for church and nice  events, but we also had some great casual  ones we played in all the time.  And for some reason I can’t find any of those pictures…probably because we were playing and getting dirty and not really taking pictures.

If I could get away with dressing them in Jon Jons forever, I would.  But alas, we don’t live in Alabama or Arkasnas and where we have always lived people look at you a little strange if your child is in a Jon Jon past 3 years old… and Dave kind of gave the veto at 2. 

I think this might have been one of our last Jon Jon outfits before we retired into cute polo collared shirts, button downs, sweaters and khakis. 

I also have a thing for funky and fun cotton layettes.  I know, such a contrast from the traditional smocked or appliqued jon jons.   But a fun Zutano outfit is adorable, and oh so soft to cuddle up to.

Or something super cute and soft like this…  which I may or may not have bought the other day to start off our baby’s wardrobe (when I found it on a super deal site). 

And one of the last things I love for a little baby boy is the sleeper gown.   Yes, a gown for a baby boy.  For at home, for sleeping, for those days when all you do is swaddle, cuddle, nurse and change diapers every hour.  And for when their legs are permanently in a bent position. 

Double Swoon…. Especially when it is Zutano and a gown.
I love gowns for newborns.    

So there you go.  You all now know what a Jon Jon is, my aversion for baby boys dressed like grown men, and my love for the infant gown.  And my strange twisted style of traditional and trendy.